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The Vomit Solution to Thirsty Men


(funny sound) (upbeat music) – Wow, looking good ladies. – Thanks
– Thank you. – Why don’t you come over here. – No thanks. – Rawr, I like a challenge. Look, I know you want it, so come get it. – [Female Narrator] Some guys have the unfortunate illness of
hearing yes when you say no, but now there’s a cure. – Here, try this. (upbeat music) (retching) – [Female Narrator]
Introducing Ipecac To Go. – Ugh. – [Female Narrator] Yes,
the very same Ipecac derived in the 18th Century
as an expectorant for illness. Back then, women medical professionals also discovered its power
to cure the illness of men who thought that no meant yes, and now, in the charming
old-timey bottle to go. – You are very beautiful. – Thank you. – Can I get your number? – No. – Oh, you have a boyfriend? – No. – Then you have to give me your number. – [Female Narrator] Since
the beginning of time women have always worked to not be treated like second rate citizens, but there is nothing second rate about the quality of this
douche bag repellent. – This is a book. (retching) – I was skeptical, but there’s something about ralphing your entire three egg brunch on a guy that speaks louder than any words. – [Female Narrator]
Perfect for the workplace. – Ha ha, alone at last. Whoa, where do you think
you’re going honey. I’m just playing with you, seriously. What do you got there? Okay, a little sip, little tequila? (retching) – [Female Narrator] Ipecac To Go, convenient when any occurrence when that pesky male presumption flares up when it’s clearly not wanted. (retching) (retching) Ask your doctor about Ipecac To Go, but when you do, make it seem
like it’s for something else, otherwise they definitely
won’t give it to you. (women cheering) – As a doctor, I find Ipecac To Go disgusting and horrifying, there is no way I can
endorse this product. However, as a woman, I find
it surprisingly effective, and I definitely use it, yes. – Yo, at first it was like all these girls I’m tryna get to ride
my D are mad sick, yo. Then after about the
20th time it happened, I was like, (slap) maybe I’m the problem. – [Female Narrator] Side effects may occur like headaches, dry mouth,
and feeling empowered. Taking Ipecac To Go will
weaken your digestive tract and your gag reflex overall
will become like a hair trigger. If you see someone else puke, smell anything bad, laugh too hard, sneeze, or look at soup for too long, you will definitely vomit. Sometimes you will just
hurl for no reason at all. But it’s so worth it when you watch some entitled D-bag wear your spew. It’s our time ladies. – [All] Ipecac To Go! – [Female Narrator] Ipecac To Go, for when you say no, but they hear yes. (retching) (retching) (squeaking) – Hey Jim. – Oh, no, oh no man. – Oh, no, oh no man. (giggling) – It’s Ipe– – Op, sorry. (laughing) (sobbing) – You know what I’m saying, ha ha! I’m the best! – Do the, uh, curtains match the drapes? That’s not right. – [All] Ipecac To Go! – Fill ‘er up, love it. (howling) – Ha, ha, wolf pack,
that’s me and my boys.

Bernard Jenkins

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